- Silent Leadership
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- Stop being so nice!
Ahoy,
A while back, a friend of mine was having some trouble at work.
They’d been working a new job that they’d been really excited for.
The people there loved them, they had been doing a good job, they felt like things were really going their way.
But then, less than one month before the end of their 6 month probation period, they were told their work wasn’t up to scratch, and if it wasn’t sorted within the next month there would be consideration about their future employment there…
5 months… nothing.
Not a word that things might have been out of place.
Management had been so nice. Consistently saying how they fit in there, and how their work was great!
Then out of nowhere, their job hung in the balance of one month.
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This is a prime example of toxic niceness.
Being “nice” and “polite” and “pleasant” all at the expense of long term progress.
Management had been nice throughout their probation period, but that ultimately wasn’t the kind thing to do.
By failing to do the kind thing, which would have been to provide actionable feedback earlier, my friend was now in a vulnerable position.
Building relationships and rapport with your team is vital for leaders.
But this doesn’t come from being “nice” all the time.
At the end of the day, you’re a leader and you need to lead. That means doing the kind thing over the nice thing.
Take the time to develop relationships, absolutely.
But if you’re doing this at the detriment of their development, putting their careers at risk, you’re failing to be kind.
What does this mean then?
Have the difficult conversation
Provide coaching and support
Be honest early
Nobody likes having that difficult conversation, but by being “nice” and avoiding it, you’re failing to support them in the long term.
Provide the coaching they need. You don’t have to be a d*ck in the way you go about it. It is possible to be kind and nice at the same time!
But get it done early.
How often have you left a small problem you haven’t wanted to deal with, only for it to grow arms and legs over time.
Getting it done early will save you a lot of pain in the long run.
So how should this situation been dealt with?
Firstly, for a 6 month probation period, I would expect at least a monthly 1-on-1s with management.
During this time, an open and honest review of the good things they’ve achieved, and the points they need to work on should be shared.
At least 1 actionable goal should be set to be achieved before the next meeting.
Progress in a certain area.
Completion of a certain project
etc.
Expectations should be set early on and deviations highlighted as soon as they are seen, aligning the next goals with getting things back on track.
Following this, there should be no surprises 1 month before the end of the probation period!
In an ideal world, this would be great for all team members.
Everyone needs areas for improvement pointed out to them sometimes and it’s great for productivity and motivation to have goals set for the future.
How could you start implementing something like this for your team?
I really hope you got some value out of today’s newsletter. If you have any feedback at all, feel free to hit reply and let me know what you think!
And as always, have a great day.
Reece
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